In a style that reflects the Screwtape Letters, explore how the enemy of Christians might use American politics to distract and neutralize believers. Stay with it to the end and be encouraged at the power all believers hold. Sometimes fiction can open our eyes to see reality more clearly.

If demons held a national convention: what they want kept secret

“Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”
(Eph. 6:10-12 NKJV)


In a style that reflects the Screwtape Letters, explore how the enemy of Christians might use American politics to distract and neutralize believers. Stay with it to the end and be encouraged at the power all believers hold. Sometimes fiction can open our eyes to see reality more clearly.

Note: The events depicted here are fictional.

In a style that reflects the Screwtape Letters, explore how the enemy of Christians might use American politics to distract and neutralize believers. Stay with it to the end and be encouraged at the power all believers hold. Sometimes fiction can open our eyes to see reality more clearly.

It was late. I was flipping through the TV. After weeks of nothing but convention coverage and political pundits, I needed something else to ease my mind so I could fall asleep.

Suddenly, the screen went blank. Then it flickered. I recognized the old timey “snow” from the days before HDTV.

“This is odd,” I thought. This TV normally goes to a blue screen when it picks up static.

Before I could wake my husband, the snow disappeared. There, in black and white, was something that reminded me of the Twilight Zone.

The lower third let me know I was watching another — rather unconventional — convention.

For a few minutes, I witnessed the opening night of:
The American Principality Convention.

A large dark creature slithered to the podium, leaving a trail of black sludge across the stage. He checked his teleprompter and with a deep hiss began …

This meeting is now called into disorder.
We begin with a moment of raucous shrieking as we pledge allegiance to the master Adversary and Destroyer, our great leader and prince of this world, Beelzebub.

(Crowd screeches and wails.)

It is crucial you attend the meeting designed to exploit the specific American group your delegation represents.
If you are on the Heathen Brigade, you’re in the wrong half of the convention center, you idiots. Leave now.

If you’re on Operation Xian — (Remember we never utter that name of the carpenter in ANY form; if you do, you must go bathe 666 times in slime and cess before rejoining your crew.) If you’re assigned to the rodent Xians, make sure you’re in the right segment.

There are three now that Demon Resources has shuffled assignments.

1 –
With all our success in taking Xians out of favor in this nation, the nominal “believers” are falling like zebras. Consequently, we don’t need such a high demon-to-human ratio for the ones who no longer find it beneficial to claim the name of (you know who) openly. If you are part of the remnant assigned to the weak ones, join your squadron down in the Preyer Chapel.

2 –
If you are on Mission Imposter, you are meeting in the Snake Hall.
As these warriors exit, let’s give them a round of shrieks. The human assets they’ve been cultivating for the past decades have stepped up in their world, and are using the carpenter’s name to garner votes of true evangelicals.

(Crowd erupts with howls and hisses.)

3 –
The last group of tempters is meeting in this arena. We are stepping up our efforts to target the Concerned Xian voters. We have serious business to discuss regarding these bipeds that claim to be both committed to their father (our enemy) and also self-identify as patriots of this ridiculous nation they call “United States.”

Now that we have everyone in their right meeting, let’s get to the business at hand.

We begin with a profile of our group 3 target demographic:

These Xians are the ones who recognize our checkmate (unless their commander intervenes). Regardless of who wins this American election, their new leader will be morally bankrupt with an aversion (whether obvious to the people or not) to their beloved Constitution.

Yes, we will take their Queen Liberty and lock away their prized values of freedom, Creator-given rights, and the sanctity of life and marriage. (In fact, we should look into a terrorist attack on that blasted statue in New York Harbor. Wouldn’t that just be the jalapeno on our nacho?)

But I progress.


Let me be clear.

We don’t care about their election. Either of their candidates will do just fine for our purposes. The executive council has a master strategy for the demise of this little experiment in freedom and what they have planned is way above our pay grade.

No, the outcome of their election is not the concern of our boots-in-the-air demons like you.

Your job is to exploit this moment in time to the fullest. We are pulling out the M-16s and AK-47s of discouragement and disillusionment. Your ammo is limitless, but must be discharged while keeping your targets consumed with the latest political headline.

Weigh them down, deflate their spirits, and make the air they breathe heavy. Whisper these words often, “Out. Of. Options.”

(Crowd chants, “Out of options. Out of options. Out. Of. Options.”)

Yes, my fiends. It sends hot flashes through my cold slime to hear you shriek in disunison.

Their world is disintegrating around them. Every day they wake up to new news of hate and violence. They are actually arguing about which lives matter most and believing other bipeds are their true enemies.

Speaking of this, I’d like Delta Force “Bash the Blue” to stand for a round of shrieks. You guys are killing it!

(Ovation of shrieks and hisses for the elite squadron and clever pun.)

In summary:
Fix their eyes only on what they can see.
Our tactical team is giving you plenty to work with.

(Crowd chants, “Fix their eyes. Fix their eyes. Fix. Their. Eyes.”)

With all of this good news, you may be wondering why our committee chair called this special strategy session. He was contacted by the executive council to warn us about Sleeping Giant Syndrome.

How many of you are familiar with this despicable virus?

Those who were on active duty during the Great Human War may associate it with the American meddling in our holocaust, but it’s actually been around for millennia. Our Scurvy General has never been effective in concocting a vaccination.

Sleeping Giant Syndrome (SGS) is the disease of being awakened. There are a few different carriers, but words from the enemy’s playbook seem to be the most insidious. Those words can have a shelf life of weeks, even months!

Symptoms include a strong appetite for their scriptures and a feverish passion as their courage is restored. Their prayers will be like a strong cough ~ you won’t be able to get a moment of silence from all the hacking and invoking the name of their commander. They’ll resist your distractions and refuse to sit. Always standing. Firm, even.

Once they begin to open themselves to their father’s words and align their thoughts with his thoughts — HOPE will rush in. It will remind you of a dam breaking. You won’t be able to agitate your targets with the threats of terrorism, economic meltdown, or a culture hostile to their beliefs because they will be filled with the strength of our enemy.

As peace infects their hearts, our fog of confusion will lift, and their eyes will seem to sparkle.

Our best offense against SGS is a good defense.

We must keep them ignorant of the blessings they already possess. Hide their armor under a pile of dirty clothes and never — I repeat, NEVER — let them access the power of that dreaded ghost. We know he is greater than our prince; make them depreciate this little fact.

We must help them expect the right to comfort and a government that protects their rights. These American ones are especially gullible since they’ve had it so easy for 240 years. They’ve wrapped their flag around the cross and now some aren’t sure where one begins and the other ends. Perfect.

If their constitution crumbles, we prey their faith falters right along with it.

Above all, keep the main thing the main thing:

Train them to obsess over what is seen and for Satan’s sake — keep them out of the enemy’s book!
If they study those words, they may begin to consider the broader unseen battle and greater purpose for their short stay on earth. That could lead to an awakening … or worse, a revival!

(Crowd erupts into gnashing of teeth.)


Along these lines, it has come to our attention that some preachers are trying to wake up their herd and prepare them to live as exiles in “Babylon.” (It makes my slime slither to hear them invoking our father’s city name, btw.)

They are revealing how much of the old timeline showcases the enemy’s people in captivity, out of favor, or downright persecuted.
Some are using those rascals Daniel, Nehemiah, and Esther to teach about how the enemy uses his servants for his purposes, even in a hostile culture. Exile is OUR turf. How dare they think it can be used to advance their agenda!

(A loud commotion is heard.)

What’s that?
Where’s that noise coming from?
You — there on the back row — how dare you interrupt!

You have intel related to exile you think is relevant to this discussion?
Well, this is highly unconventional and disruptive.

I like it.

Someone give that tempter a microphone.
State your sector and then proceed.

(The young demon slithers into the spotlight and begins speaking.)


“Proud delegate from the great sector of Pennsylvania, your evil one.

I have a new assignment that was recently transferred to me from Virginia. She matches your profile and is grieved about this election. For the first time in her life, she isn’t sure she can vote for her party’s candidate. I’m having so much fun with that, btw.

But here’s the problem. I think she contracted SGS and she’s been studying the enemy’s playbook. She made a list this morning of all the letters written when our hero Nero was in charge of Rome. ¹

(Crowd chants, “Hail, Nero. May he thrash in torment.”)

She’s noted how many of her favorite hope-giving verses were written during the reign of one of the most evil rulers we ever promoted.

She had the enemy’s book open to Romans 13 and underlined, “For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.” Then she noted how the phrase “minister of God” was used twice by that traitor Paul to describe authority, even when NERO was the authority the original readers would have been interpreting.

I watched her countenance change as she contemplated God’s use of evil for His good. She has taught many children about the spread of the Gospel that was accomplished via the persecution of the Church. That enemy intel is supposed to be classified!

(Crowd erupts into hisses, “Classified. Classified. Classified.”)

She then read the entire first letter of that pirate Peter. She did a background check first and discovered it was written around the time Nero burned Rome and blamed it on the Xians, thus kicking off our Great Persecution.

She began to make notes about how Peter was writing to strengthen those who were feeling hopeless because of the circumstances created by their government.

I think I saw one of those dreaded light bulbs go off.

(Entire arena gasps.)

She lingered WAY too long on those blasted trade secrets about our Lionship’s hunting strategy (5:8) and then backed up to focus on submission and humility.

She even copied the enemy’s orders and Plan of Resist:

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. .”

She went on to reread the Philippians letter in view of living in a world governed by Nero and then dabbled in some of Paul’s instructions to Timothy.

I couldn’t stop her!

And I saw the dam break just like you described. I had to leave when she started flipping through Ephesians because her sword was actually glowing!

However, before I fled, I copied the last page of her journal:

I will open my eyes and fix my hope.

I will not cower in fear, give into hate, or slip into apathy.

I will not mourn the past ‘glory’ days, believing God works through evil and exile — not just light and liberty.

I will pray for my leaders and be a valuable citizen, even as the majority of my nation mocks my values.

I will vote my conscience without sacrificing my principles and trust God with the rest.

Whoever wins America’s White House in this election is no match for the One who has occupied the Great White Throne for all eternity.

If first-century believers could persevere under Nero, this 21st-century one can withstand whatever happens under

And then it was Snow.>>>

That’s when the reception began to break up. I slapped the TV and it returned for just a few brief moments.

What I saw I will never forget.

Air raid sirens began to blare. The convention arena shook and the steel frame began to bend. Demons were fleeing for cover and stabbing each other in the back to save their own wings.

As the reception on my TV slowly faded, I heard these last words from the loud speaker.

“Code red! Code red! Code red!
The bloody Xians are waking up! They are firing off one prayer after another! It’s too much for our countermeasures!

Their swords are covered with the enemy’s blood and his words and doing great damage to our strongholds. They are returning to their local congregations and loving their neighbors!

The fog of hopelessness is lifting and our strategic outposts are left vulnerable! Our election strategy is disintegrating.

Heaven, no! For Satan’s sake — hold your ground, you fiends! The damage all across the American principality is growing. Contain your sector. Don’t let them infect others! We can’t handle”


And then it was Black.>>>

I didn’t even try to hit the TV for more, but instead fell to my knees, adding my prayers to the warfare.

The end.
(Or is it the BEGINNING?)


¹ Authored during the reign of Nero (54-68 AD): Romans, 1/2 Corinthians, Ephesians, Philippians, Colossians, 1/2 Timothy, Titus, Philemon, 1/2 Peter

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26 responses to “If demons held a national convention: what they want kept secret”

  1. Laura Avatar

    I loved this post. There is a real war going on for our country and it’s not going to be won on election day. Thank you for using your craft and talent to encourage our hearts. Thank you for remindng us which Kingdom to fight for.

    Also, this reminded me of a song by All Sons and Daugher’s called Wake Up with lyrics that I have been praying through, “We have seen the hope of your healing, rising from our souls is the feeling, we are drawing close-your light is shinging through. So wake up, wake up, wake up all you sleepers, stand up stand up all you dreamers, hands up hands up all believers.. Here we stand our hearts are yours, not our will but yours be done.”

    1. Christi Avatar

      Which kingdom to fight for. We do get distracted and think our fight is for this earthly kingdom and country. The enemy loves to redirect our focus.

  2. Jenna Avatar

    Thanks for this post. It’s entertaining and creative yet also communicates important truths and a firm Scriptural basis for hope. This post has encouraged me to trust God and to keep praying.

    1. Christi Avatar

      Hope. yes!
      Trust God and keep praying. More yes!

      That’s the exact takeaway I was hoping and praying it would offer. ;-)

      Thank you for affirming how God used it for you.

  3. Lynne Maris Avatar
    Lynne Maris

    Standing strong in prayer!!

    1. Christi Avatar

      Right there with you, sister!

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